Why Modern Matchmaking Beats Swiping Right: A Conversation with Fern Connections

Let's be honest - spending 50 minutes a day swiping through dating apps sounds exhausting (and according to research, that's how much time people actually spend on them!). If you're like me, you've probably downloaded and deleted dating apps multiple times, only to find yourself playing "guess their age by their outfit" instead of actually connecting with potential matches. Been there, done that!

That's why my recent conversation with Daphney Poyser, founder of Fern Connections, was such an eye-opener. After experiencing her own frustrations with traditional matchmaking services, Daphney launched Fern Connections in 2020 to create an inclusive matchmaking space that specifically serves the LGBTQIA+ community and allies. As covered in NBC News, The New York Times, Bloomberg, and Business Insider Fern Connections has quickly become a leader in inclusive matchmaking services.

Why Matchmaking Makes Sense

"Dating apps are not meant for you to find your person," Daphney explained during our chat. And honestly? She's right. While apps might have worked better a decade ago, today they're often just a "vicious cycle" of seeing the same faces across multiple platforms.

Instead of endless swiping, matchmaking offers:

• Background checks on all clients (safety first!)
• Personalized matching based on compatibility, not just looks
• A pool of people who are seriously looking for long-term relationships
• Professional coaching to help you prepare for successful dating

It's Not Just About Matching

One of the most interesting things I learned is that Fern Connections doesn't just throw people together and hope for the best. They offer both matchmaking and coaching services because, as Daphney puts it, "You can put people together, but that doesn't mean they're going to stay together."

Want to dip your toe in? You can join their lifetime database membership for $500 - a one-time fee that puts you in a pool of verified, serious daters. For those ready for more comprehensive services, they offer various matchmaking packages tailored to your needs.

Real Talk: Dating Doesn't Have to Be "Trash"

While everyone's saying "dating is trash," Daphney offers a refreshing perspective. The key? Sometimes we need to look within before blaming the dating scene. As she perfectly puts it (with a nod to the movie Beauty Shop), some people "want to be a Mercedes when they should be a Pinto" - meaning we need to be realistic about where we are in our own journey.

Ready to try something different than the usual swipe-right routine? You can find Daphney and her team at Fern Connections on Instagram or visit their website to learn more about their services.

And here's a little success story to leave you with: Daphney used her own methods to find her person after being single for five years, and recently celebrated with a commitment ceremony. If that's not a testament to matchmaking done right, I don't know what is!

Want to hear more insights from Daphney? Watch the full interview on The Funky Intellect YouTube Channel and follow The Funky Intellect Podcast for more conversations about modern dating, relationships, and personal growth.